Transition Lenses

This is my internal monologue: 

1. I find myself in a state of constant reflection. Some of life's smallest details bring back fond memories from not so long ago. And looking back, I can't help but acknowledge how much has changed. The memories make me happy, but I'm struggling to figure out how I feel about the past/present comparisons. 
2. It's sad because we grew up and grew apart at the same time. 
3. I've said this before and I'll say it again: There's a big difference between doing things that make you happy and actually being happy. And right now, I don't know where I stand. Sometimes, I feel like I'm just going through the motions. I make plans and I have fun. But at the same time, I have lingering thoughts/emotions that make me question if I am actually "happy". 
4. Ignored and insignificant. Yep, thats me. (Shout out to the "seen"/"read" options for making me feel this way)   
5. I can battle anything with a seemingly indifferent attitude, but the fact of the matter is I still care. I'm willing to put in effort when other people could give less than two flying fucks. And I absolutely hate that about myself.
6. If anyone ever casually says "lool kk" to me in conversation, I might chop their head off. 
7. If I hear "Clarity" on the radio one more time, I might chop my head off. 
8. If #6 and #7 were to happen simultaneously, I honesty do not know what I would do with myself. Perhaps hire someone to do the chopping? 
9. I'm beginning to feel that this blog post is the equivalent of a really obvious subtweet. Thank God for my virtually nonexistent fanbase, because I'm really not about those online fights. 
10. I need sleep. Adieu for the time being.